Weaknesses

I still wish I don’t have these flaws. I am pretty sure they are indeed flaws.

1. Zero Poker Face

I lack composure and wear every emotion on my face. Back at CASETiFY, there were too many times when my fully expressed reactions drove Wes crazy. Just this week, in a meeting with the funders, the wife actually laughed at my exaggerated expressions. I can’t stop looking how I feel. And I can’t stop feeling. I wanted to change this, but doing so would require a lot of something else that I also lack …

2. I Am Winging It

Ever since I was a kid, I have been quick to pick things up. I learned fast. I had wits. But I rarely ended up winning, because I lacked the skills and discipline to truly learn and grow. I remember playing a Tetris-like video game once. I came out of the gate kicking everybody’s asses. Then slowly but surely, my cousins caught up. They were learning, evolving, improving. Me? I never really understood the game. I wasn’t learning. I was just playing on instinct.

That pattern stuck with me through life. I always ran faster out of the gates than most people around me. It’s made me quite successful in my work life, because my smarts and quick thinking are usually enough to deal with most of the nonsense in the corporate world.

I know, I know. This probably sounds like classic imposter syndrome. But I know my inner workings. I’m not saying these weaknesses make me a loser. I have many real strengths too. But these flaws are real, and I know it.