Buddhism was designed for life hackers

Source: https://www.instagram.com/invaderwashere/

I am convinced that whoever designed Buddhism did kettlebell swings, used grayscale on her iPhone and brought her own coffee mug to order masala chai with almond milk. The fact that all these ridiculously vague stuff was so well summarized into bullet points convinced me that this person was a geek, or a great chef. 3 Gems, 8 paths, 4 truths …

Here are 3 #GrowthMindsets you need to embrace in 2019:

1. The “Shit and not-so-shit come and go and come” mindset:

When you have a shitty day, think of one better day that happened, and therefore the fact is, a better day will come again. Therefore there are two ways to embrace this mindset: Life is always going to be shitty, experience it, or life is always going to be not shitty, enjoy it. Therefore if you accept this, you will expect less, fear less, and be more free (supposedly).

Dad vs Daughter:
“Why were you sad when Santa gave you a jumper?” 
“Because I wanted a L.O.L Surprise (plastic piece of shit) doll!” 
“Ok. Let me help. Why are surprises so fun?” 
“Because I didn’t know it’s coming!” 
“Good. Do you get it now?”
“Oh, I should not expect to have a LOL and then Santa will give me one?!”

2. The “Bite me in the ass” mindset:

Your actions cause some reactions. Even though it is hard to truly believe that all actions cause reactions that will bite you in the ass /do you good in the future, it surely is a good alternative to always use this mindset to approach everything.

Dad vs Daughter:
“Should you tell Betty you are not her BFF today? But what if this could bite you in your ass?”
“Should we finish the entire cheesecake? But what if this indulgence would indeed bite you in the ass?”

3. The “I don’t exist, therefore ‘me’ is unimportant”” mindset:

I don’t actually really exist. The good news is, no one else really exists either. We are just a mixture of the same shit. All cakes are just mixtures of some flour, eggs, yeasts, salt, water, sugar and heat. Therefore if we choose to think that we don’t really exist, it is easier to just figure out what else to do when we don’t have to worry about ourselves. The next level shit of this mindset is, we don’t exist because we are part of everything … hmm … grand … the cosmos … ok. WTF?

Dad vs Daughter:
“You and I are basically the same.” 
“You mean I am not special?! You said I was special!” 
“No. You are special, I am special, everyone is special!” 
“I am not special~~~~” 
“Listen to me, it is a fact — we are not special. Accept this fact. It’s the same as accepting the fact that I am your father. Accept this, and we are freed to focus on something else.” 
“Now you are saying I am just like Betty! She is thin and smacks her food! And I don’t like you!” 
“See? The moment you keep thinking about yourself you are in pain!”
“Mom, he is being mean again!!”

#impermanence #non-self #interdependence

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