Mornings πŸŒ„

These days, these pandemic / lock down heavy days, I have two types of mornings.

Type 1:

  • 430-5: Wake up
  • 5-540: meditate
  • 540-740: Breakfast, laundry, read, write

Type 2:

  • 430-5: Wake up
  • 5-7: Exercise
  • 7-720: Meditate
  • 720-740: Breakfast, laundry, read.

Why do I struggle with it? How am I struggling with it?

First, I dread type 2. I would start worrying about the next type 2 morning the moment I finish the workout. The workout is not tough at all. I know I feel good after it. Yet, I still get all anxious about it, constantly.

Second, I always feel unfulfilled after going through Type 1, even though I really look forward to it. I felt I hadn’t done much, that I didn’t make any intellectual breakthrough or didn’t profess any new wisdom.

It is fascinating how expectations work.

What are experiments I could try to change this? Specifically, are there things I can do to make me less anxious about workouts and less hopeful about the 2 hour reading and writing time?

Or, is it simply a matter of how I handle these inevitable emotions?