Category: 4. Live Less Bad
-
What Were Steve Jobs and Hitler Doing When They Were 44?
Hitler became the chancellor of Germany in 1933 when he was 44. Jobs officially returned as the CEO of Apple at the age of 44. I am 44. The moment we existed high school, age started to become irrelevant. It was as if, at the moment of graduation, the line of age just elongated and…
-
Why Meditate? 為何打坐？
To meditateis to unlearn our relationship with time, self, and then reality. 打坐是重新認識與時間、自己、和現實的關係。
-
Why I left Apple. Why I am trying to leave Work.
I wanted to stop rationalising. I couldn’t square the dilemma. I was sick of the wrestling. The value of I was doing, from selling shoes to selling phones, needed more rationalisation than I could stomach. The “rationalized” values were at least “one order” away from what I was actually doing daily: Selling iPhones:{1st Order Impact}…
-
😪
Today is August 31st, 2020. In the last 2 months, every day between 11am-3pm, my brain would give up. It would become stuck. I would fall asleep constantly – at a bench in a park, on a bus, anywhere. Summoning motivation was taxing. Staying focused was hard. It is detrimental to my ability to function.…
-
🌇
Jing and I, walking in the warm late afternoon sun, with chai sleeping in his stroller, near Tai Koo Shing. I glanced at her, and the sun washed out the colors and contours of everything. At that moment, I remembered to be grateful. The 4PM sunwashes out contrasts on her facetill the end of time
-
It’s the phone, stupid.
Ah. Ok. I think I have a way to break the spiral of the morning struggle. Don’t start with the phone. Ok. Let’s see. What should the process look like? I need it for podcasts. Can I find another device to do that? Or will I be able to resist the apps? Will I be…
-
Break. Broken.
I laid down the matStuck, staring at the lights, stuckBroken, thoroughly. Today I skipped my morning routine. I broke it. Or I am finally broken. My streak was probably … a couple of years long. The riddle I am trying to solve is, if I have to have breaks like this, or are there other…
-
💼 Work, flow, Aug, 2020.
This has been a struggle that lasted much longer than I ever imagined. I don’t have an office, so I hop around a lot. Since the pandemic, 100% of my sessions are now online. 930-1200: Cafe Sort through notes on Drafts on my Mac. File and organise notes into TheBrain. Start writing ideas on Bear.…
-
Mornings 🌄
These days, these pandemic / lock down heavy days, I have two types of mornings. Type 1: 430-5: Wake up 5-540: meditate 540-740: Breakfast, laundry, read, write Type 2: 430-5: Wake up 5-7: Exercise 7-720: Meditate 720-740: Breakfast, laundry, read. Why do I struggle with it? How am I struggling with it? First, I dread…
-
安全了，又空虛了。
昨日收到了新的護照。為期4個月的申請過程終於完結。我們一家總算有後路了。 真是既可喜又可悲。 可喜是老婆和我有幸有條件着草。真心感激我們父母。我們實在好不幸運。 可悲的，當然就是要走佬。作為香港人，我們從小就體會到，其實一切都是借回來的。而期望任何東西變得可靠、變得值得我們去依靠、去當作寄託，都是不實際的、不智的。 未來本來就是迷糊。而寄託，究竟是為面對未知的未來的錨，還是指南針？我想我心裡希望的是以寄託為錨，讓自己感覺穩定一點、安全一點。還是其實寄託更應像指南針，用來幫助自己有方向地飄流瀚海？ 還是我完全錯了？還是我對寄託的期望和理解徹底錯了？